We Understand

Craven Delights

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Are the do-gooders not taking you seriously? Do heroes undermine your plots to make the world an evil paradise? Do you feel unappreciated playing second fiddle to the likes of Brian Ravenlock, the Avengers, or the Guardians? At Villains Anonymous, we can help.

Even if you decide not to come to our seminars and meetings, remind yourself of your dark purpose with this simple mantra: I"m bad and that's good, I'll never be good and that's not bad. There's no one I'd rather be than me.
 

Craven Delights

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The video spot cuts to a figure cloaked in shadow. At the bottom of the screen scrolls the text "Names have been changed, faces blurred, and voices disguised at participant request.

"Blow up the Marketplace one time, and you're labeled for life. Where's the justice in that? Wasn't even my fault. I was just told to deliver the package, how was I to know what's in it? I'm an innocent victim of circumstance."

White text at the bottom shows the name A-Side

"Oh shut up you mewling quim!" The person looks from the left to the right, its voice changing noticeably. "You knew exactly what we were doing when we bought those explosives. Yatsuba's cakes are too good, the status quo must be upheld. It's all about balance. No one is allowed to be that good at anything."
The Text shifts to display : B-Side.


((If you play a villain and want them to do a piece for Villains Anonymous go for it! This is an open thing meant to be fun and easy. Your OC can complain about the difficulties in doing what they do best. ))
 

Craven Delights

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"Feeling oppressed? Unappreciated? Like your schemes never come to fruition? Well we're here to help you manage those feelings of frustration."

Screen shifts to a heavily pixelated individual, "Yeah, I tried to kill Brian Ravenlock a couple of times, and that guy just never goes down. Then, HE blew up the marketplace fighting me and I wound up taking the heat for it! I mean, I'm evil so I didn't pay for anything, but still. That was just inconsiderate. VA helped me work through those feelings, though, and this time Brian's (&&**% toast."

Screen goes back to misunderstood 'Villains'. "So join us here at Villains Anonymous, where every bad decision isn't necessarily the wrong decision."

Feed ends, followed by a sponsor plug.

Brought to you by Matadero coroner and meat packing services, unrelated, inc.

(thanks to Necromesh!)
 

Craven Delights

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Local television stations are hacked at 0930 with the following feed.

"We gladly interrupt The Real Housewives of WestEnd to bring you the following.



6 years ago today, Henchman 24 died in the line of duty. His sacrifice for the greater evil will never be forgotten. We ask for a moment of silence to remember a great man, and a true minion."

The feed goes silent for ten minutes straight.

At the lone Rhydin t.v. studio
"Where the hell is this feed coming from?" Station Manager Rick fumes, pushing aside an intern to mess around with a broadcast console.

"We've no fuckin' clue! This equipment is from Terra, circa 1980. It's like masturbating with icyhot, cool at first, but now this crap's a painful mess to work with..." The injured intern grunts from a sprawled position.

"You speaking from experience?" Rick spits, literally. "Need to get this stuff off the air..."

Meanwhile, on television
Henchman 24 is survived by one alcoholic wife and 4 junior hencmen.

We at Villains Anonymous ask that when you supposed "Advocates of Good and Justice" are engaging your arch nemeses to remember that everyone has, or had, family and loved ones. Being a Villain isn't cheap and often a thankless job. Many like Henchman 24 live a life of silent service.

Take a few more minutes to remember those who left this world too soon...."

The image lingers for five more minutes before the screen cuts to the broadcast test pattern following an explosion in the distance.

Radio chatter comes alive with reports of an attempted bombing at Rhydin Television Studios. Suspect dead on the scene from an premature detonation.

(the above picture is the property of the artists and creators of Venture Bros. )
 

Craven Delights

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Across Rhydin several audio and visual wavelengths are hijacked to play the following . The Villains Anon symbol rotating in the lower right corner.






[youtube]fcbazH6aE2g[/youtube]


and scrolling across the screen at the end...
thisisn'tourvideobutwehackedandstoleitanywayhahahahehehesuckit.


(seriously, the video belongs to Blind Ferret Entertainment )
 
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